By myself, yourself, yourselves, ourselves, themselves

When ‘by’ is used with the pronouns ‘myself,’ ‘yourself,’ ‘ourselves’ or ‘themselves’ it means ‘only’ + the pronoun. So, if a teacher asks her student, little Johnny, “And who did you do that homework with?” and little Johnny replies, “I did it all by myself!”, little Johnny is saying that no-one helped him do his homework and he did it alone. The ‘by + reflexive pronoun’ pattern is often used in response to a question using ‘with’.

Kiefer: Have you seen the newly released movie called “Bright City”?
Rufus: Yeah, I really liked it. It somehow satisfied a longing I had deep inside me but didn’t realize I had.
Kiefer: Who did you watch the movie with?
Rufus: By myself.
Kiefer: By yourself? Isn’t that kind of weird?
Rufus: I don’t know why people make such a big deal* about someone seeing a movie alone. It’s not like it’s such a big social event anyway – you don’t talk during it.
Kiefer: True enough.

*’to make a big deal about’ something is to make something into a big issue when it really isn’t. Here, Kiefer is suggesting that Rufus is weird because he watched a movie alone, but Rufus doesn’t think it is an issue because, in Rufus’s opinion, watching a movie isn’t a very social act.

Mom: Do you want me to take you to the park?
Byron and Colby: Ah, Mom. We’re 12 years old. Isn’t it time you let us go by ourselves?
Mom: I guess you’re right. Just be home by 6 for dinner.

Jennifer: You won’t believe it. I just heard that Ellen and Jack took a trip to the mountains together.
Sandra: By themselves?
Jennifer: You bet!*
Sandra: But I thought they hated each other.
Jennifer: They sure had us fooled.
*You bet=a strong “YES!”

Ask your partner these questions.
Q1: You’re walking along the beach. Who are you with?
A1: By myself. or I’m with (my) __________. / by myself.
Q2: You’re swimming in the South Pacific. Who are you swimming with?
A2: I’m with (my) __________. / by myself.
Q3: You’re on some remote island. Who would you like to be with?
A3: I’d like to be with (my) _________. / I would like to be by myself.

- What is something that you like to do by yourself?
- What is something that you like to do with other people?
- Do you ever travel by yourself? / Would you like to travel by yourself?
- What would be the advantages of traveling by yourself?
- What do you think would be the disadvantages of traveling by yourself?